This is a total "woe is me" post, born of intense frustration. Please don't take offense....
- its cd27, with no sign of ovulation. apparently, the met isn't working as much as I thought
- the met is, however, taking away all of my energy. it's worse when I eat high sugar foods. and if I get even a teeny bit off the dosage schedule, I pay for it the entire next day
- I saw another bfp in the blogosphere this morning. that makes 3 in a week, and that's only on my blogroll. (of COURSE I don't begrudge ANY OF YOU your success, so please please PLEASE don't think that)
- every bfp I see makes me wonder why the FUCK I haven't seen mine yet
- worse than that, it makes me think I may never see one
- which of course leads to the whole "what have I done wrong?" thought pattern, and we all know how much fun THAT can be
- I'm tired of having to work so fucking hard for this, with no real hope left (right now anyway) for success
- even if I thought it might be time to move on to the "next step", our finances simply won't allow it. not now, not next year, and maybe not in 2009
- in 2009 I will be well beyond the age at which I "ideally" wanted to start my family
Woe is me, woe is me... I'm going home early and getting drunk... Woe is me, woe is me... I'm getting so drunk that I pass out and will sleep the day (and hopefully this mood) away
Woe the fuck is me
4 Comments:
You're not alone my friend. Those BFPs continue to dance in front of me like an elusive mirage. Why they come for others while avoiding me still baffles me. I must have been very, very bad in a previous life.
Can I recommend putting alcohol in the coffee? That way, the buzz comes on slowly, you can get some work done, AND you still get to go home early and pass out. You finish the drinking portion at work. Multitasking!
PJ, I hate knowing that I'm not alone, and yet it helps to know that I'm not alone. Shitty shitty situation, isn't it?
Mel, THANK YOU! I needed a laugh, and you provided it! Now, can I sneak to the liquor store while the boss is at his lunch meeting? hmmmmmmmmm
If I was not so far away I would come and drink with you!
Deanna
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