Friday, October 26, 2007

obsession junkie?

I've not posted much in the last week or so because my mind has been on other things. With the camper purchase, and all the odds & ends that go with it (insurance, title transfer, registration, blah blah blah), my mind has really not been on TTC at all lately.

I must say, its been a very nice distraction. I wish that we had timed it during a 2ww, but it's a good distraction nonetheless. Which got me thinking...

Is it really a distraction, or just a new obsession?

Seems as tho my mind "works best" when it can completely focus on 1 thing, for ridiculously extended amounts of time. Sure, there have been other distractions over the last 3.5 years, some good and some bad, and yet, my mind always comes back to this obsession over kids. Or cycles. My chart. A new med. The next procedure. You get the idea.

I guess I'm just wondering when the obsession will end. Will getting pregnant stop it, or just transform it into something new? What about labor? First steps? First day of school? The discussion about siblings?

How do I calm this obsessive mind of mine? I feel as tho I'm doomed to always have something - anything - in my life that feels mentally and emotionally "all consuming". And to be honest, that's really scary. And it certainly can't be healthy.

So, seriously folks, how do I learn to calm my mind? Or at least refocus it into "obsessions" that I have more control over, that bring about something healthy for me, my family, etc? I'm really looking for some honest and constructive suggestions here. Help! Please!

3 Comments:

Kaci said...

I'm glad the camper has provided a temporary distraction from the world of TTC. I can't answer your questions, but I don't think anything will ever consume you the way TTC does. Sure, you'll obsess over a birth plan, parenting skills, breastfeeding, whatever...I imagine you'll read books & websites galore to educate yourself so that you can make informed decisions. I know I tend to jump from one obsession to another, but I don't think I take it to the extreme, and I really don't think you do either. If you did, the HD girls would have to plan an intervention because that is when it becomes unhealthy. :)

chicklet said...

I can't help you there, I'm as crazy as you are. without something to focus all my attention on, I find something else to focus on...

Kim said...

I understand your thoughts on this. I obsess over things and I'm hoping at the end of this journey I'll be a little less obsessive and more relaxed. Because we all know there is NO relaxing during TTC, only minor distractions (btw - glad you had some with the camper - lots of fun to come w/ that, I'm sure! Congrats!)