Coming out of the sad

Saturday was hard - harder than I thought it would be. We cried, a lot. And not dainty-single-tear-rolling-down-the-cheek crying. Ugly-sobbing-choking-on-snot kind of crying. But, if you can't choke on your snot with the one you love.....

Friday was a nice night. Paisano snuggled and purred with both of us, and spent some time looking out one of his favorite windows to watch the birds in the yard. It was a good way to spend our last night as that family of four.

My punkin-pie went peacefully. It was obvious that he knew, as he didn't put up any fight at all when we laid him down on the table for the injection. Grumps and I both took that to mean that he was ready, even relieved.

I miss him, terribly. I've been sad (for him) for a month now. I'll be sad for as long as I need to be. But it is a relief to know that he's not sick anymore, and not in pain.

But I still miss his sweet smooshy little face, his big ol' clod-hopping paws, the way he'd carry a conversation with us, or come running (and often bitching) when we'd whistle for him, and the way he'd greet us at the door when we came home.

Life will be good again. We'll find another furry little thing to add to our family. But Paisano will always and forever be missed.